we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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