He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
