Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
