So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
