Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
