I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
