never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
