Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
There are leaves in my underwear?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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