Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
So much Jack, so little girl.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
