There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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