hell yes lets make some ravioli
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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