it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Randomize
