when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize