i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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