You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
You are a genius and a whore.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
