he shaved USA in his pubs
He uses pillows to masturbate.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
