My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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