please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
