Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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