im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
