i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I had to cum in my sink.
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