My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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