Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
