Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize