i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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