Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
