Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
