did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I want to make a zoo with you.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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