Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
me + whiskey = a bad person
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
