It's like God shit irony all over that family
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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