distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
