Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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