Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
