Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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