Where is the hickey?
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
