I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Randomize
