I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
