i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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