community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
