At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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