Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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