Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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