how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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