Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
