that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
please come you make the beer taste better
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
