if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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