Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Randomize
