Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
