we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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