problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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