Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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